The Triple Gem

The sangha share tonight is on the Triple Gem, or the Three Refuges. I wonder, when you hear the word refuge, what comes to mind? Shelter in a storm, or a safe harbor, place where you can finally just exhale. Refuge is where we turn when we feel overwhelmed or uncertain or unsafe.

It’s what we lean on when the ground feels shaky. Not really a question of whether we seek refuge. I think we all pretty much do.

The question is, where do we seek it? Where do we seek it? Sometimes we seek refuge in what soothes us temporarily. We might stay busy so we don’t feel failure. We might strive so we don’t feel unworthy.

We might people-please so we don’t feel criticism. We might do any number of things to numb ourselves so we don’t feel anxiety or emptiness. These false refuges, as Tara Brach calls them, comfort us briefly, but over time they deepen our suffering.

But what if refuge means something deeper? What if refuge isn’t about escaping? What if it’s about returning? Return to awareness, return to truth, a return to love. Don and I went on a retreat in September, and at the end of the retreat The teacher, Shel Fisher, offered a refuge ritual, and she was really clear this did not mean that we were becoming Buddhist. It wasn’t about adopting some new identity or agreeing to follow a bunch of rules.

No robes, no sandals, no shaved heads. It was about our intention. It was about consciously choosing sanctuary in what’s called the Triple Gem: the Buddha, the Dharma, and the Sangha.

Each of us received a simple red string, and we tied 3 knots in the string, one for each refuge, and then we tied the string around one another’s wrists. It was done in silence. It was a quiet, intimate ritual.

So I have mine— I have— it’s hard to see with all my bracelets, but There’s a string here. It’s got the 3 knots. Um, Shel encouraged us to touch the knots as a reminder of our intention once we were back in our daily lives, right? Back to the routine.

Here’s your reminder. This ritual was very meaningful and touching. The ritual itself.

But that deeper invitation was so powerful to honor your path, your own path, deepening it in your own way. And these intentions are for yourself, but at the same time, it benefits everyone. And so it was beautiful, and it really got me thinking about the Buddha, the Dharma, and the Sangha, and what it means to take refuge in those things.

And so I’m not a Buddhist scholar. And I’m not going to have a scholarly conversation about it right now. I’m going to simply offer my personal reflections and, and thoughts.

So the Buddha, on one level, the Buddha is this historical figure, the teacher. But when we take refuge in the Buddha, We’re not worshiping a person. We’re trusting awakening itself.

When we take refuge in the Buddha, we’re trusting our own capacity to walk in the direction of beauty, truth, and deep understanding. Buddha is awareness, the capacity to pause, to breathe, to see clearly even in the midst of chaos, reactivity. So for me, taking refuge in the Buddha is trusting that awakening is possible, not just once long ago, but here and now.

The Dharma is the teaching, and it’s also the truth of how things are. It’s the path that leads out of suffering. When I think about taking refuge in the Dharma, I’m thinking about entering that path that path out of suffering, that path of transformation.

And the Dharma reminds us that our intentions matter. Our actions rooted in greed, anger, delusion— those lead to suffering. The actions that are rooted in wisdom and compassion, those lead toward freedom.

But the Dharma is not just the words. Thich Nhat Hanh said the Three Jewels are not just notions They are our life. The true Dharma is revealed through our practice.

If mindful breathing becomes a habit, then when difficulties arise, it’ll be natural to touch into the Three Jewels within ourselves. So it’s not just for emergencies. Walking mindfully, eating mindfully, sitting mindfully— these are all ways of taking refuge.

And to take refuge in the Dharma is to live it. To let it shape how we speak, how we respond, how we love. The sangha is the community of practitioners.

Here we all are. And whenever we take refuge in the Sangha, we’re committing to building and participating in a community that lives in mindfulness, harmony, and peace. That’s no small thing.

What we’re doing here together is no small thing. Even if we have a really deep appreciation for the practice, it can be really difficult to continue on the path alone. A sangha, says Thich Nhat Hanh, is like fertile soil.

Seeds planted in dry ground will struggle. In rich soil, they will flourish. So in our sangha, we can flourish in our practice.

We need companions who are committed to awareness and compassion. We need friends who help us see clearly. We need people who can remind us who we are when we forget, preferably in a gentle way.

To realize love, we need sangha. Thich Nhat Hanh wrote that the Buddha of the 21st century may not be an individual, but a community, a sangha practicing loving kindness together. When we tie those 3 knots, in the Red Stream, we were being invited to feel into each refuge personally.

What does awareness mean in my life? What does truth ask of me? Where do I allow love to hold and support me. The string connects us to one another and to generations before us. It also fades It frays, and eventually it falls away, just like we do.

It teaches impermanence, teaches that taking refuge is not a one-time act. It’s a continual returning. When the bracelet falls away, we choose again.

When we notice we’ve taken refuge in distraction or striving, We choose again. When fear is driving us, we pause, breathe, return. The Triple Gem is not somewhere outside of us.

Remember the compassionate friend? From the meditation, the wisdom you heard, the love you felt. That’s not somewhere else. It’s awareness in this moment.

It is the truth of this breath. It is love expressed when we show up for one another. The Three Jewels are not abstract ideals.

They are lived qualities. When we practice mindfulness, we care for the Buddha, When we live truthfully and compassionately, we embody the Dharma. When we support one another, we build the Sangha.

And when we take refuge in one, we take refuge in all three. The invitation of the Triple Gem is simple and profound: to trust awakening, to walk the path of transformation, to do it together, and to begin again in this breath, in this moment. Right here.